SHIT HAPPENS !

Have you ever wondered how gratifying and at the same time how liberating SHITTING is? I guess not. We do it every single day(most of us) and give absolutely no thought to it at all. We just take it for granted. It is an important event in our daily routine for our body to function and yet we deem it to be repulsive. This is so not done and this is why Blog Baba is back to liberate all of you hypocrites from your narrow minded returdedness.

OK! SHIT HAPPENS! But have you considered -

Why some float and why some sink to the bottom? 

Why do we have a wide variety of colors to gloat upon? 

What is the main reason for them being rock solid or gooey? 

And finally why do most of them have to be tantalisingly smelly? 

[I should try to be a poet someday]

Well, this blog attempts to answer all the intriguing questions given above. We all know(atleast those of us who listened in bio class in school) that our small intestine helps in digestion and absorbs nutrients and water from the food we ate and the rejected stuff goes down along the large intestine as yellow paste where more water is absorbed back into the body. I guess this is why we have either gooey or solid poop. If we do not give enough time to the body to collect back the water we have mushy goo(loose motion, diarrhoea) and on the other hand if we give ample time to the large intestine to do its job we can have normal goo. However if you don't shit for days on end you will have rock solid goo as almost all the water that makes the goo mushy would have been absorbed back by the body while it was waiting in the rectum after being passed out from the large intestine. You can try it out if you have even an iota of doubt in your mind. (This can also answer why do we have poop in different sizes - think about fusing and growing compactly with the loss of water).

We also have poop in a wide variety of colors. Trust me, I've had green poop and was certain that I was going to die. However now, I know better. Normal poop is brown in color. It is due to a pigment called bilirubin which arises due to the breakdown of red blood cells(R.B.C) in the liver and bone marrow. It then comes to the intestine along with digestive fluids from the liver which aid in our digestion. Here it is further modified by helpful bacteria(these help in our digestion as you would have already guessed). But the color itself comes from iron. Iron in hemoglobin in red blood cells gives blood its red color and iron in the waste product bilirubin gives rise to its brown color. Now it is natural to deduce that yellow poop is a sign of iron deficiency and maybe a cause for slight concern. However if you have tarry black poop it is a cause for major concern as it means that you have a bleeding ulcer. We also have red stains on poop due to bleeding from an anal fissure or split. And finally green poop is merely an overdose of dyed food products. Thank God! But seriously poop is a fine gauge for our health and should be taken seriously.

The two questions that remain are - Why does poop float or sink and what gives them their smell ?

Poop that floats have an unusually high gas content. Sometimes the gases produced by bacteria in our gut don't have a chance to collect into a large fart bubble, but remain dispersed in the feces. The poop then comes out foamy, and has a lower density than water. And the tantalising smell is mainly due to hydrogen sulfide that the bacteria releases. Now you can not only find out who has been farting in the room by just collecting their stool samples you have the golden opportunity to do PhD(Push harder Dummy) level research on shit, all thanks to Blog Baba. I know any kind of discussion on poop is disgusting but someone had to open your eyes to look at shit the way I do (for starters try sitting in the Indian style on Western ones)

I took one of the biggest dumps today, wouldn't flush after 7 tries, had to get hot water and melt the beast. Fucking stinks...

SKIP VIRTUALITY, MEET REALITY

Disclaimer: As with all Blog Baba blogs this post may or may not be relevant to you but trust me there are some out there who need Babas advice for their own good. Hari Om !!

Humans.... strange as we are... we all need companionship... we need people around us... to be heard, to be felt, to be recognised, to be loved, the kid in us never dies... it smiles back at every dose of appreciation. If you disagree with me on the above fact you can go back to chatting with your alter egos.

The internet cashed in on just this. From chatrooms to social networking sites and now to blogs. The bucks made so far speak not of corporate exploitation but our willingness to sell our souls for public display on HTML. The victim rate is ever increasing 

but then nobody's complaining. Everyone needs to unwind and have some quality time wasting periods in his or her life. Yes, we all deserve it!

And as the skeptic may argue that this new "age of communication" has made life easy for us... We can call and book an appointment with the doctor. We can check stock quotes on the cell phone. E-mail pictures of the new car to friends in different parts of the globe and keep in touch with all our friends through networking sites. The possibilities are endless...

We can pay the bribe online when we just dont have the cash as you can see from this picture taken in good old Bangalore

All right now without deviating from the point let's go on. The fact that modern communication has blessed our lives is undeniable. It provides us with convenience as well as gratification. But has this new "age of communication" really helped us to communicate better ??

We chat endlessly with people half way across the world on SecondLife but do we take time out to know our neighbour? We want to be heard but do we even initiate a conversation in the bus or any damn public place? Are we seeing a decrease in people who can hit the right tone at a gathering ? Could be .. cause all I see is more and more people hiding their low self esteem behind the anonymous chat rooms. The weird were to be isolated sooner or later...

But do you have to isolate yourself and join the weird league for company? Do you have to create avatars of yourself to meet up new people and make up for your almost zero social life ? The answer my friend is NO. Use the net to socialise only as much is required to stay connected to your near and dear ones. There has to be a limit to everything we use in our lives. We have to find that balance somewhere and soon. This is why Blog Baba urges you... implores you to get up from that desk and GO OUT. Breathe deep, keep a smile on your face, meet real people... by meeting I mean get to know them in person, find common interests,play football... do whatever you want to do but make a bond. And then if you want, blog about them cause everyone... i.e. EVERYONE has a story to tell.

This is your very own Blog Baba signing off in the hope that you do go out and talk to your neighbour and I pray that he or she is hotter beyond your wildest hopes... :D

Coming soon... real people... real stories cause everyone....

THE VERY FIRST ONE

I always thought that there are 2 traits in people which lead them to blog. You either blog because you are creative and would be good at this sort of thing or you are hopelessly bored in your life. If you are creative then chances are you are less bored at home and on the other hand if you are blogging mindlessly about your monotonous daily life you have a very high probability of being a bore!

This can be seen from the above graph. Anyone who lacks creativity (read low value of creative) and is STILL blogging must be highly bored with his or her life. This is represented by point 1 and is a very sad situation. What is even more depressing is the fact that they do not realise the torture they inflict on fellow bloggers by simply putting up their "blogs". On the other hand people who are creative and are blogging have very low chances of being bored with their lives and this is represented by point 2.

This has led me to discover the Yawn : Must Read Continuum which can be easily understood by the following graph -

So as long as we stay to the right of the continuum line we can have pure blog reading bliss and avoid ourselves from the occasional puke that might creep up.

So what is it that gives us a continuum shift in one blog from the another. Do we have to keep digging up interesting things to make a blog exciting ? I really don't think so... One can make interesting blogs even with one's daily life. It is very important that your blog makes the reader connect to your day to day characters. This is where a blogger mostly loses his readers. The blogger assumes that the reader knows his friends (featured in his blog) as well as he or she does. This fatality pushes his blog down the deep chasms of Yawn which we all know to be on the left of the continuum line. There are also cases of no central storyline or lack of coordinated writing which makes up for Yawn blogs.

So at the onset, I promise you that I will be coming out with quality blogs if not quantity. I mean to say that I will try my level best to stay to the right of the Yawn : Must Read continuum line and the next time you want blogs you got it baby cause you now know that Blog Baba has a serious issue on Quality Control. So bhaiyyon aur unke beheno please go for Blog Baba chaap blogs only and this is your very own Blog Baba signing off.

I always thought that there are 2 traits in people which lead them to blog and then I met the third kind...